Wednesday, August 22, 2007

Writer's Block

Ok. So i don't know what to write about.
Bear with me for a few moments and I will eventually come up with something enlightening for you to ponder the rest of your adult life considering that's how long it will take you to figure out what I have said in the few sentences that I decide to spew in a despearate yet clear-cut means of washing away the boredom that is eating away at my well known and well respected sense of humour; the very faculty that I put to maximum use when I want to while away a few hours of my life and several days of yours, given that we agreed at the beginning of this sentence that you would take more time than the average chipmunk to understand the verbal barrage that I am about to dispense in your general direction as part of my above mentioned desire to kill some time and some gray cells in that pathetic excuse for a brain that you carry around in your vaccuumed cranial cavity in a mind numbingly stupid excercise to appear moderately intelligent and/or sentient just to appease the increasing number of pseudo-intellectuals in todays society.
I could have gone on and on but I thought better of it. As I am typing this entry out of sheer boredom, it is with the deepest disdain that I see George Bush on TV making some speech about Vietnam and the war and basically kissing up to the war-vets populace of America. The worst part of it is that other people in this lounge are discussing this like it's the latest fashion innerwear sported by Gisele.
I am already spotting the typical signs of a person "getting involved" in a discussion. THe characteristic sitting on the edge of their seat, with their chins supported by their elbows staring at their co-discusser like they give a fragrant rats ass about what they're saying. This is what I call 'sounding the well. Sounding the well is the technique by which two or more idiots are involved in simultaneously trying to determine the stupidity of another person just by pretending to listen to them. People are so petty.
If I seem to be particularly cynical today, well, I have a reason. And I'll be damned if I sit and explain everything out to you. Suffice to say that I have been wronged yet again, by that supreme entity people refer to as God. Just on a sidetrack, the weather woman on CNN is really beginning to irritate me. Not only is she prancing about the screen as these fuzzy 'satellite' images flash behind her. In a tribute to her obvious mediocrity, her name is Oke. All she has done so far, is make faces and squeeze her fists together while telling us the the Hurricane Dean is decimating Mexico.
This reminds me of something that I read during the landmark Sanjay Dutt case a few weeks ago. The judge in the case had classified ALL the accused in the case into three distinct categories. The first being peripheral, the second being minor and the third being serious offences. Having thus clearly demarcated three groups, ostensibly to classify the accused more easily, he then proceeded to state that Sanjay Dutt fell somewhere between a peripheral and a minor offender. Now, this is when I decideded to take a bludgeon to his brain. People are idiots. It's as if nothing they say makes sense for more than 5 minutes after the words have escaped the intense gravitational pull of the black hole that is their face.
To further drive home this point, I am going to take the example of Michael Vick. he's just admitted to staging dogfights in his neighbourhood. He's ADMITTED that he's guilty. Yet CNN has an hour long programme involving Legal Analysts and a Radio Host(?!). For What?! The man has already admitted his guilt. Leave him be and get on with it. Don't you have some more deformed kids and mutilated people to show, since that is what qualifies as 'hard-hitting' news?
I can't take this anymore. I quit.