Cricket Fever?? naah.. its the flu.

one of my favorite bitchin subjects is Cricket.. i absolutely loathe the game.. im one of the few indians who can stand up and say honestly.. i hate cricket.. ive been forced to watch the bloody sport since everyone around me seems to love the game..

i won't trivialize the game by claiming its a bunch of idiots running around a leather ball, trying to hit it and catch it... cos any sport can be made fun of in the same way.. but what really pisses me off is the way indians love the game so blindly... they've made it so trivially common that you can't take a dump without hearing about the game..

cricket is one of the longest international games.. the 'short' version takes a little over 6 hours of gameplay and stupid talk shows about the 'game' go on for an hour before and after... that leaves precious little time for anyother sport on TV. if one channel doesnt have the rights to a cricket match they play highlights of another match.. or they have a show where they talk about age-old matches.. or its a goddamn krish shrikanth show. i hate this guy... he rambles on and on jus like a south indian should.. and on and on like a cricketer should... and on and on like retiree should.. and on and on like a retired south indian cricketer should.. i mean why do they give him so much airtime.. he has nothin useful to contribute to the bloody game anymore which is why he isn't a big commentator on TV. and he knows next to nothing about the game since every caller who calls up on his dumbass show actually disagrees with him... it jus serves to irk him more so he babbles for a few minutes more jus to get on everyones nerves..

anyway, back to the dumbass game.. tendulkar is mr. phenomenon and he can sell a bottle of piss to a paraplegic or so they would have you believe.. but when you see a person who has a completely different body shape riding the bike that HE is promoting.. and you know it can't be him... and then he comes on with his horribly oily girly voice to say 'more smiles per hour' ... makes me want to puke.. and then he goes on in his next match and gets out for 10. bloody hell.. then he's back in your face selling you boost..

its not just him though.. everyone who makes it onto the national team gets an automatic inclusion into advertisements! its incredible how everyone can buy this shit that they show on TVs as ads.. its crazy..

its frustrating that a 'sports' page in the national newspapers contain only cricket.. and a fraction of tennis, some snooker.. and horse racing.. what the hell happened to the sports in the rest of the world??? everyday, theres a page on cricket and half a page for all other sports combined.. its ridiculous... throw everybody in cricket out.. we need more washermen anyway...

and i wish everyone would stop mugging facts about cricket... we won this then and lost this then. they won this then and he took so many wickets. its crap all over the place.. everybody knows everything... its too..... common and pedestrian.. boring game with boring bowlers.. and boring everything.. throw them all out.. they dont even have cheerleaders!!!

don't even get me started on test matches! the bloody things drag on for ages.... and ages.. almost as long as krish shrikanth talks... who by the way has started his own website where he.. surprise suprise! comments 24x7 on matches.. its a running typing commentary!!! crap! as it is he doesn't do much else than run his mouth on why they threw so and so out of the ____ game during ____... who cares?! and then he comes in this dumbass ad where he says i still read my morning newspaper as i used to read a marshall delivery... i come to understand he was a bullshit batsman.. that probably means he didn't 'read' the goddamn deliveries very well or he read em really well but was too incompetent to play the bloody shot..

man... i keep heading off on a tangent.. it seems that everytime i hear krish shrikanth my blood begins to simmer... back to test matches... i'm sure many of you have sat up 5 days watchin white clothed people bowling to more white clothed people with white cream on their faces... have you ever noticed that the stadiums are almost completely empty????!!!! no one has the time and patience to sit through a 5 day game anymore..

thats probably why these guys are popularizing Twenty20... some new nonsense version, thats even shorter than an ODI.. bullshit... the way to make cricket more accessible is to reduce the number of overs to 0.. that'll make people sit up and watch it... make it as short as my attention span to krish shrikanth and it'll be a hit...

you know.. come to think of it.. i think i hate krish shrikanth more than cricket... naaah.. its like saying shit is better than puke...